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Mistake?
Not sure if this moving to the Southern U.S. is such a good idea after reading this:
FOR NORTHERNERS MOVING SOUTH:
In the South: If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.
Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store.......do not buy food at this store.
Remember, "y'all" is singular, "all y'all" is plural, and "all y'all's'
is plural possessive. Also, get used to hearing "You ain't from round here,
are ya?"
Save all manner of bacon grease. At some point in the future you will be instructed how to use it.
Don't worry about not understanding what people are saying. They can't understand you either.
The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective "big'ol,"truck or big'ol" boy. Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way. All of them are in denial about it.
The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.
Be advised that "He needed killin" is a valid defense here.
If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this," you should stay out of the way. These are likely to be the last words he'll ever say.
Do not be surprised to find that 10-year-olds own their own shotguns, they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.
In the South, we have found that the best way to grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it and call it a driveway.
AND REMEMBER:
If you do settle in the South and bear children, don't think we will
accept them as Southerners. After all, if the cat had kittens in the
oven, we wouldn't call 'em biscuits.
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