noo fawm ov pubblik transpawt

[The gArfish]

i av discuvverd a noo waiy ov gettin abowt onn de fkin cheep. jus gow hichhykin wiv a fkin lyfejakkit onn. nawmully itt taiks abowt fawty carse too pas mee beforr sum bastud givs mee a lifft butt ifn yew ware a lyfejakkit itt ownly taiks abowt too carse beforr sum nobbur stopps. i orlwaiys tel dem dat i av bin shiprekt. forr sum straynj reezon de peepul in reddin downt seam too finnk dis iz straynj

gArf

 

[jackeen's Missus]

BTW (WTB) when did you take up the ballet dancin gArf?

And are you light on your feet?

Missus

 

[Louise]

Well, Broadmoor is less than 20 miles away from Reading...

 

[The gArfish]

And are you light on your feet?

i flote lyke a fkin buttafly an stinng lyke a be. de ballay lesons av elpt mee a lott wiv de futwerk inn de bokksin butt yew downt arf luk a ****t inn a tootoo inn de bokksin rinng



gArf

 

[jackeen's Missus]

And I'd say you scare the bejaysus out of the little ballerinas in Swan Lake...especially with the Boxing Gloves on!!!!

Sounds like you're in training for some event.

Good luck

Missus

 

[The gArfish]

And I'd say you scare the bejaysus out of the little ballerinas in Swan Lake...

i downt fink i av evver bin too de swon layke mississ. doo thay lett de jettski boyys onn.

gArf

 

[jackeen's Missus]

No I think there's a speed restriction and the 'buoys' are a bit dodgy (they can split or something)

Missus

PS I think there's dead swans in the water as well...

 

[The gArfish]

No I think there's a speed restriction

i fkin ate de spead limmits. de sowfampton worter az gott wan butt i downt taik now notiss ov itt. mynd yew de waiy dat lode ov amerricun junk(powlaris) eyve gott keaps braykin dowen der aint mucch daynjer ov mee fkin braykin itt. de fkin fing pakt upp lasst wik sow i corld de cowstgard on de HVF . sowlint cowstgard sowlint cowstgard yewronobbur yewronobber an de cowstgard cum bakk an sed gArf yorr a ****t. fkin cheak ov itt. enywaiys thay ad lernt der leson cuz thay daint sennd mee a fkin rib itt waz a arun clas. de RLNI boyys sed dat de rib wasunt cumin owt too mee agen cuz ders ownly free nobburs inn itt an thay waz a likkul bitt nervus affter de lasst likkul innsident

gArf