Scottish First Aid

[mike k]

A woman sitting in a restaurant suddenly began to cough.
After a few seconds it became apparent that she was in real distress, and
two locals, Kenzie and Brian sitting at the next table turned to look at
her. Kin ya swaller? asked Kenzie.
The woman signalled 'No!', desperately shaking her head.
Kin ya breathe?" asked Brian. The woman shook her head No!!! With that,
Kenzie walked behind her, lifted up the back of her dress, yanked down
her knickers and ran his tongue up and down the crack of her backside.
This shocked the woman into such a violent spasm that the obstruction
flew out of her mouth and she began to breathe again. Kenzie swaggered
back to his table and took a deep swig of his beer. Brian said in
admiration "Ya know Kenzie, I'd heard of that
bloody Hind Lick Maneuver, but that's the first time I ever seen somebody
do it."